Three for the price of more. (“Vlog”)

As fate would have it (necessity), I’m pleased to say (I’m not) that I have bought myself a new laptop (at this stage, the bank has bought me a new laptop). So I’m typing this on my iPhone. But more on that (the laptop) when something stops working. I should probably mention that it’s running Windows, so it’s not exactly working now. So, to clarify, more on that when something stops working.

I’m currently sitting in the hostel I booked into (in the hope that it wasn’t going to be too entirely crap) and am pleased to say (I am) that it’s not entirely crap. In fact, it’s ok. It’s clean, it’s well run, the staff are decent, there’s a good kitchen and communal area, some of the rooms are pushing the limits of how many beds they should contain, the bathroom and shower areas wouldn’t want to be any fewer or smaller and it’s on a main road, so any of the rooms situated at the front of the building get a fairly good level of traffic volume wafting in – which is enhanced by having the window open. Which it is. Due to the amount of bodies sleeping in relatively tight confines. And it having been surprisingly warm for a country in which a certain sort of vitamin deficiency runs rampant.

This being said, I’ve extended my stay and have moved into a room with a friendlier floor area to bed ratio at the rear of the building – in which there are more people, but out the window of which is less traffic doing the siren, whining biker, bus, bus, bus, bus, truck, whining biker, siren routine. Mainly due to the fact that there’s another building situated directly adjacent to the window. So, this being the first night I’ll be giving the new abode a whirl… actually, regardless of having an internet connection, which, if you read my last post you’ll understand was the reason for the tardiness behind the delay in posting it, I didn’t post this. Mainly because I hadn’t completed more than two paragraphs. So it’s several days on now. And I’ve extended my stay again.

I should really be video logging it, giving you a walk through of the premises. I could take you for a ride in the lift and add in some elevator music which would be the product of the first audio result to appear after having searched for ‘elevator music’ on a popularly referred to search engine. I could show you the hygienically crafted stainless steel kitchen and the pink wall paper on the wall in front of me which clashes ferociously with the red laminated counter which I’m sitting at, contemplating what my life has come to, and how it has come to this. I could then heavily edit the footage into a chopped-up-moving-image-audio-visual collage that leaves you wondering what you’ve just been subjected to, but I’m dubious as to how the new laptop would handle anything more than the operating system it’s already been burdened with. So, alternatively, I’ll stay away from the use of any unnecessary technology, or reviews that would almost certainly ensue, and write a vlog (“vlog”) reviewing the accommodation instead.

That being said, I don’t mind the fact that breakfast is included, or the use of the free WiFi throughout the building. It’s ok with me that it’s only a few minutes walk from one of the main transport hubs, making it all too easy to be on time to almost any appointment anywhere in this heaving metropolis. Except the one that I’m on my way to now. As I write this segment from the train. Several more days on. Due to the distractions that come with residing in my current lodgings. Which, on a scale of 1-10, I’d give an overall rating of – this is not the case with the last hostel I booked into the first time I came to this city…

By the way, it’s an Asus. Not the cheapest option going, but the second cheapest. I was severely tempted to go with the Hewlett-Packard that was selling for 60 of an undisclosed amount in a particular currency more – mainly for the purpose of gaining the opportunity to do a comparison review against my last laptop – but, in the end, I did the maths, and concluded that opting for a different brand would widen the scope for sponsors at the time of its review. Which is scheduled to occur when I realise just how much of a bad purchase I have made.

•••

I am currently sitting at a cafe, sipping on an espresso, trying not to look like a croissant (It’s probably not worth continuing to try and explain why I keep on getting distracted from actually posting anything). Thankfully, there has been an unusual amount of sun recently, which continues to bathe anyone who has managed to secure an outdoor table. With the seating options being as slim as they are, I was briefly joined, at one point, by a couple of gents – one of which either didn’t want to be sharing a table with a not as pale-faced “European” as I was expecting to be at this point in time, or was giving his friend the silent treatment due to some earlier unseen incident. I don’t know what his problem was. He was a European, I’m a “European”, his mate was European, we should all have really been spending our time together entering into discussions on making arrangements to form our own union. But they left. Mainly due to the fact that he picked up their tray and walked of. But it’s ok. I haven’t been sold as any sort of viennoiserie yet, and am managing to fend off thoughts of tying the steel framed table to my leg and throwing myself into the river – somewhat due to the influence of the sun, but mainly due to the fact that the river is several hundred metres away, and I’ve already walked far further than I intended to before arriving here. Which is why I intend to sit here a while longer and wait to see if any other passive aggressive chums who don’t want to be sharing a table, join me in sharing the table.

I came to be here after having walked along the river from where I met with some folk about working on some projects with them. I tried not to give too much reference as to the state of my life at the moment, which was going fairly well, except for the fact that they kept asking questions, to which I felt obliged to provide answers. But it seemed to go ok. Which will be confirmed on Monday when the phone does, or does not, ring. I’m subjecting myself to situations such as this to supplement my blog while it gains traction in gaining sponsors to supply me with such things as technology and accommodation for the purpose of reviewing and assisting me on my journeys.

Now would usually be a good time to mention that I’m looking for sponsors to supply me with such things as technology and accommodation for the purpose of reviewing and assisting me on my journeys, but the waitress just came by and cleared the table, asking if I’d finished, in a way that suggested I may have been sitting here for too long taking up space for those inside who are beginning to tie their tables to their legs.

I wonder if they know how far it is to the river.

•••

I feel old and unintelligent. I’m sitting on a park bench looking out over the business district after having moved from the cafe where I was seated. Two boys have just walked by; they looked to be about 13. They were interacting with their mobile handheld devices and one of them started on about why his 4G wasn’t doing something that he thought it should have been. I wonder if he realises that by knowing what 4G is, he already knows more than I did at his age. At his age, I was inserting a cassette tape into a silver box in order to try and load a game of Space Invaders. Not that that’s a bad thing when compared to the system that was in full swing of establishing itself as the popular choice of home computing bedazzlement at the time, but I’ve seen newer technology in museums.

I don’t know how the elderly do it. I understand now why they sometimes lose their minds, why they sometimes seem to become detached from their current surroundings and appear to live in the past; in a time that was their day. It can’t be healthy being alive for long enough to witness such shifts of knowledge with the coming of each generation. I now understand the genius behind their senility – to have younger generations, who knew more at the age of 13 than they did, be continually baffled by the workings of the mind of someone who, at 13, they were smarter than.
But then again, unlike the generation before me, at 13, I knew what Windows was. And have been all the more unintelligent for it since.

An elderly couple have just sat down beside me on the park bench. They’re talking to each other. They’re sitting next to someone significantly younger than themselves who’s typing on an iPhone. They didn’t know what an iPhone was at my age. I feel no more intelligent for it.

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